Do you ever feel like that is you? I sure feel like that’s me!
The gym: I’ve been going steadily for the last 1 ½ - 2 years. I went from a size 14 to a size 12. I’ve lost about 15 pounds total. I know that my sugar level and cholesterol have gone down quite a bit. I don’t feel like I’ve accomplished much though. I went out shopping two weekends ago because I needed new jeans that fit me better. I was thrilled to be trying them on and having them look decent on me. I even went and got some new work pants we’ve been approved to wear and they were a size 12. But I tried them on today and realized that they are snug around my abdomen. I knew they were like that when I bought them, but when I tried on the 14s they were obviously too big. So I got the 12s. That’s incentive to keep the weight off, yea? And it’s also incentive to start pushing even harder to lose more inches. I want them to fit comfortable everywhere, not everywhere but my waist. Am I ready for what lies ahead though? Am I ready to go fierce and get rid of the junk food I keep in the house? I usually feel pretty good about the meals I have. My problem is snacking. Sometimes I snack because I’m hungry and sometimes I snack because I know the food is in my pantry and it sounds good. The problem is that after I eat the junk food, I feel like utter crap. Am I ready to go back to an even more strict diet? Well, I guess I have to be because that’s what it’s going to take. I also need to revamp my gym workouts. Running is still out of the question for me - not because I don’t want to, but because I can’t. My knee is still giving me problems and I really don’t want to go to the doctor right now and hear him utter the words “you need knee surgery”. So it’s time I revamp things and push the envelope more. I need to challenge myself on a daily basis - which is hard for me because I’m generally at the gym by myself. For some reason I do better when I’m with someone alternating the same exercises between us. Maybe it’s because I like competition even if I know I don’t stand a chance. I’m not they type to compete against myself (one reason why I never decided to try Crossfit).
The place I call home: They say the state of your living space represents the chaos in your own life. I look around and you know what? I’d have to say I agree. While my place isn’t a pig sty, there is definitely room for improvement. I need to keep up more on the actual cleaning part. I always feel better when it’s super clean. And as always I need to work on keeping everything tidy. I’ve certainly made progress with the tidy factor, but I’m still not there yet. It also seems that no matter how much stuff I get rid of, there is still the same amount after the fact. I sometimes wish I could get rid of half the clothing in my closet. Just up and donate it. There is a good majority of it that I don’t wear, so why do I have it? Because it’s already been purchased and I like to have options. That’s why. I need to figure out another reasonable way to declutter my life. Maybe I need to suck it up and just get rid of clothes, thus emptying my closet. Maybe I need to go through my kitchen stuff and if it hasn’t been used in the last year (ok, two years) get rid of it. I have a bazillion cookbooks that I love looking through but I rarely use them. So why can’t I seem to just get rid of them!? What is my malfunction?!
Work: Actually, work is the one place where, although I occasionally get stressed out, I generally don’t have many qualms. I enjoy what I do. That is a HUGE plus in my book.
Dating: I’m not. It’s as simple as that. I tried the whole marriage thing. It didn’t work. I tried the relationship thing (albeit it was a long-distance-out-of-state one) but that didn’t work either. I’ve had a few guys ask me out, but they just weren’t right for me, therefore I’m not dating. I’m okay with that… for the most part.
So there you have it. My main trouble spots are the gym and home. Gee, how’s that for answers I already knew.
Oh. And did I mention I turn 33 next month? I'd say old enough that I should have my shit together. Don't you think?
I just need to buck up and keep at it. There may very well be light at the end of the tunnel. We’ll see.
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